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I Have A Problem When It Comes To Catching Flights

The gist of it

Waiting in airports is not my thing. It’s boring and I don’t like the anticipation of just waiting to be carried thousands of feet in the air doing practically nothing. With me, I have all the best intentions to write something f*****’ brilliant but I end up falling asleep, asking for seconds with the flight meals and then drinking too much wine, which leads me back to sleep again.

So what happens when you have someone who hates waiting around for a flight? Alot of drama, rushing around, cursing and probably lost a bit of money too. If you follow me on social media accounts, you’ll have giggled once or twice at my live status updates on my disasters on the way to the airports. Maybe I should plan better, or not find the need to neck shots hours before the journey. Nevertheless, its a regular occurrence.

I’ve been through my fair share of dramas prior to boarding flights (or in some cases not boarding them). Take a look at the select few incident list I’ve made:

Georgetown, Guyana to Port of Spain, Trinidad 

After a day venturing to Kaieteur Falls, I had an early morning flight to Trinidad. I decided to drink at the bar with a fellow traveller. After drinking the bar clean with too much El Dorado rum and cheap beer, I crashed in bed at around 3:30am, thinking I’d have half an hour sleep before heading out. I woke up at 5:37am. SHIT. My flight was at 6:20am. Now, most people would worry a whole lot more, but still not worrying too much, I got on with things and gathered my shit together. I knew the airport was only a 10 minutes drive so I could still make it. With 11 minutes of packing everything and running downstairs I dramatically I found out that the airport I was flying from was 45 minutes away and NOT the 10 minute away one.

So, out of nowhere a ‘taxi driver’ who had a wife beater singlet on and was sweating all of his ecstasy out of him pulled up and ushered me in. Perfect timing, I think. To this day I still do not know how we did not crash. Seriously, at least three head ones where I couldn’t even murmur a word. It was Fast and Furious: Guyana.  After throwing all my Guyana dollars remaining through the window, I got to check in to see my flight had been delayed. It was 6:18am. I made it, just.

Bangkok, Thailand to Kualar Lumpur, Malaysia to Melbourne, Australia.

Podcast coming soon (Tales from a Walker) 

I was on a short visit to Bangkok and met up with my South African friend, Natasha. We decided to head to Khao San Road for my final night before a 7am flight to Melbourne. Well, as you can imagine drama followed. We ended up bumping into my mate Sammy from Australia and the night got messy. Somehow during the course of the night, Sammy, was rolling on the floor, kicking out like a turntable and ended up kicking a Thai bouncer. Trying to stop him I soon found myself being punched by this bouncer then Natasha  got hit too! I had no idea what happened, it was chaos. Waking up to get my flight the next day, I left for the airport. After worrying about my injuries, a doctor I visited in Bangkok airport said I delay my flight because my nose was injured and might explode mid air. It would have cost 500 baht, but I decided to chance it. I got back to Melbourne and both eyes were puffed up. Turns out Sammy had conjunctivitis and in the midriff of everything it had given to me. I Skyped Natasha a couple of days later, and guess what, her eyes are puffed too! Not one of our finest moments.

Bali, Indonesia to Singapore

I had been in Bali for two weeks and had an imminent flight out to Singapore. Bali was amazing and I was really feeling it having been with a great bunch of people that I didn’t want to leave.  I got to the airport, checked in with my bags and was in the line to board. Like you know, show your boarding pass and get on the plane. Then I had huge change of heart and decided to stay. Everyone thought I was mad!  As I embarked the airport the security staff had their suspicions about why and took me into an office to question me I managed to get past that in the end and funnily enough my friend Markus who I’d been hanging with in the group had a flight to Malaysia and done the EXACT same thing pretty much at the same time as me! Weird!

Bali, Indonesia to Singapore (2nd flight)

After taking them extra two weeks in Indonesia, I had planned to make it to Singapore this time around. Well that was at least until I arrived at Gili T, which was just a non stop party back in early 2013.  I had met a real cool Bohemian bunch of backpackers in the Gili Islands and as always felt the urge to stay.  I had a flight for Singapore the next day at around 2pm from Denpasaar, Bali airport. Around 11am I kind of remembered that and asked my buddy Zane what time it was. He replied with the time and then promptly went on to say “Yep you’ve missed that one too.”

Bangkok, Thailand to Manila, Philippines

I had arrived on time and checked my bags in with about 30 minutes to spare. When I look back I realise this was kind of late. Then I was told by the Air Asia staff that entering the Philippines, you need an outward flight or I would be refused entry. Then they promptly followed with “you have 20 minutes to book a flight, the internet cafe is on the 6th, top floor”. No rush then?  So I slugged my bags up the stairs, booked a flight to Jakarta eventually after many internet cut outs. After reaching check in again they told me the flight had been closed.  I couldn’t believe it! Thanks for your help guys! I had to go all the way back to Bangkok, book another flight for the next day.

Amsterdam, Holland to Newcastle, UK

I had flown over for the weekend for a reunion with friends I had met in Asia. The Sunday morning, my flight back to the UK was at 630am. Ignoring this time, I was out with friends until 4am. I woke up at 8am, completely missed my flight. However, after calling up KLM for a quote on another flight the same day, I was given a price of 400 Euros. I decided to try my luck at the airport, managed to blag a lovely women who gave me a ticket for the 12pm for free!

Ibiza, Spain to Leeds/Manchester, UK

It was my first time on the White Isle and I didn’t want to leave. I had been planning to stay there for a week but missed my first flight and made it 10 days out there. So, with one flight missed, I booked another one. I got to the airport to find out that the one I had booked was delayed by 4 hours, and that I had to change airline. So eventually I paid an extra 200 Euros to board another flight to Manchester. Then I had to take a train to my Teesside.

Manchester, UK to Cancun, Mexico

A recent one in 2016. I had booked my flight through Thomas Cook, a one way ticket to Cancun, Mexico. I chose Cancun because it was the cheapest to fly into Mexico. Anyhow, a friend from Melbourne is living in Manchester on a working holiday visa. So I decide to catch up with him for some all day beers. Anyhow, a girl I had reacquainted with from the Northeast (where I’m from) had literally just moved to Manchester. One way or another we all ended up getting way too drunk in Manchester and then a combination of trying to locate one another, falling asleep on a couch and then waking up with one hour until my departure inevitably led me to miss that flight too.

Post Author
Tommy Walker

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